“What is your best programmer joke?”

Jon Shea August 15th, 2009

There’s an amazing thread on Stack Overflow titled “What is your best programmer joke?” The whole first page is full of good ones that I hadn’t heard before, but the top post is really priceless:

A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?”

The man below says: “Yes, you’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field.”

“You must work in Information Technology,” says the balloonist.

“I do” replies the man. “How did you know?”

“Well,” says the balloonist, “everything you have told me is technically correct, but It’s of no use to anyone.”

The man below replies, “You must work in management.”

“I do” replies the balloonist, “But how’d you know?”

“Well”, says the man, “you don’t know where you are, or where you’re going, you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault.”

  • Patrick Hurley

    Three men, a mechanical engineer, a mathematician and a computer programmer are in a car going down a mountain road when the brakes fail, the careens down the hill barely staying on the road — it finally comes to a stop at the bottom.

    The engineer hops out, slides under the car and starts inspecting the brakes, trying to determine what failed.

    The mathematician grabs his pad of paper and begins calculating the lateral G forces, the static friction coefficients trying to understand how they were still alive.

    The programmer looks at the car, the mountain his friends and says “let’s push up to the top and see if it happens again.”

  • http://jokekidding.blogspot.com Salam

    In projects different teams that collaborate come to point where they do not understand each other what they are saying. So, here is a joke that depicts this situations perfectly:

    * Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in one month.
* Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.
* Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
* Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.
* Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.
* Resource Optimization Team thinks they don't need a man or woman; they'll produce a child with zero resources.
* Documentation Team thinks they don't care whether the child is delivered, they'll just document 9 months.
* Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with a delivered baby.
* Tester is a person who always tells that this is not the Right baby.
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